My Cup Runneth Over

It's November, and most people (where I am from, at least) are celebrating Thanksgiving soon. A significant amount of people have been making Facebook statuses about what they are thankful for every day. I didn't participate in that trend because 87% of my friends would ignore it, 10% would read it and grumble about it, and only about 3% would enjoy what I had to say.

While completing an activity with some of my students, though, I realized that I have quite a lot to be thankful for, and I should express this. Some of what I am thankful for is people, and they need to know how grateful I am towards them. So, instead of posting something on Facebook for people to skip over, I am writing about it on here. You all choose to read my posts, so I don't feel as bad. The following are some of the prompts that I used with my class.

What does being thankful mean: It means knowing that your life is better because of something, and appreciating it.

What opportunities are you thankful for: So many. Going to college, participating in band and going on all those fantastic trips, working with the Upward Bound program, just to name a few.

Something about myself I am thankful for: Being tender-hearted.

A person I am grateful for because they inspire me: P!nk and Miranda Lambert (so what I don't know them personally.)

Someone who always makes me smile: My kids. All of them. All 300+ of them.

An adventure I am grateful I had the opportunity to experience: Being a military girlfriend. That was definitely an adventure..

Something I am thankful for about my neighborhood or community: That this is a safe, small-town  community.

Something I am thankful for about school: It made me a little less naive.

Someone I really appreciate because they support and encourage me: My family. They have always told me that I could do anything I set my mind to, and I feel that they mean it. 

Something alive I am thankful for: Flowers. They don't really serve a purpose, but they are good for the soul. The prettiest bouquet of flowers I ever got was a mix of yellow flowers: roses, daisies, sunflowers, and lilies.

Friends I am thankful for: Too many to name, honestly. A list of those I talk to on a daily-ish basis would include Chrissy, Trevor, Ryan, David, James, Steven, Brad, Mark, Joshua, Adam. (I have a lot of male friends, huh.)

Someone younger than me that I am thankful for: My little girl, Emma.

Someone older than me that I am thankful for: My Mama

Something invisible I am thankful for: Laughter

I am thankful I learned how to: Be patient. (After all, I hear it's a virtue. lol)

An activity I am grateful for:  Swimming. Being in the water (ocean, lake, pool, doesn't matter) is my happy place

Someone who teaches me I am thankful for: Ramona Garcia and Mr. Maurice Dean Jasper.

Something I am thankful for that is:
       - Square: My Bachelor's Degree
       - Round: The ring my daughter Faith gave me.
       - Triangle: Awkward Pillow
       - Rectangle: My work badge. It means that I have a job, and I am thankful for that.

Something I am thankful for that uses technology: Medicine. Modern medicine is a fantastic thing. I've had a lot of injuries, and I am always thankful for the doctors and nurses who have all this technology to help. (Lung surgeries, cracked ribs, cracked sternum, bruised tailbone, concussions, broken fingers, broken ankle, asphalt burns, all kinds of stuff!)  

Something I am thankful for that is:
       - Blue: My Mama's ring
       -Orange:My orange dress. I feel pretty every time I wear it.
       - Red: The ladybug I received after surgery. His name is Francis.
       - Green: My Grandma's apron. 
       - Yellow: The sun. The brighter is beams, the happier I am.

An animal I am thankful for: Flutter-bies. (aka Butterflies).

Someone I really appreciate because they spend time with me:Once again, too many to name. My family and my close friends have always been there for me.

Something about my home I am thankful for: It is always filled with love and laughter.

Something I could not live without: Music

Something in nature I am grateful for: The changing of seasons. I love that I live in an area where I get to experience all four seasons (although Winter could be a little shorter and I'd be happy.)

Something you cannot touch you are thankful for: Prayer

Something I am thankful someone did for me: For all those who served, are serving, and will serve in the military to keep me free and safe.

Sounds I am thankful for: All of them. Several important people in my life are part of the Deaf Community, so I'm thankful that I have the ability to hear.

A sight I am grateful for: Children running towards me with outstretched arms and smiles.

"Perhaps Mr. Collins Has a Cousin"

Mr. Collins: Mrs Bennet, I have been bestowed by the good grace of Lady Catherine de Bourgh a parsonage of no mean size. It is my avowed hope that soon I may find a mistress for it. And I have to inform you that the eldest Miss Bennet has captured my special attention.

Mrs. Bennet: Unfortunately, it is incumbent upon me to hint that the
 eldest Miss Bennet is very soon to be engaged. But Miss Lizzie,next 
to her in age and beauty, would make anyone an excellent partner. 
Do not you agree?

Mr. Collins: Indeed. Indeed. A very agreeable alternative.

If you aren't familiar with this excerpt from the Jane Austen novel
 Pride and Prejudice, allow me to clear it up for you. Mr. Collins is 
telling Jane's mother, Mrs. Bennet, that he is interested in marrying Jane.
 Mrs. Bennet tells him that Jane is already on her way to becoming engaged 
to another man; however, Mrs. Bennet tells Mr. Collins that Jane's sister,
 Lizzie, is just a step down in comparison to Jane, and that she would be
 a decent backup. 

Personally, if I was Lizzie, I would be livid with my mother if she persuaded 
a man to go out with me instead of my sister because my sister was already taken.
To me, this says "Mom thinks I can't get a guy on my own, so she is trying to push
Jane's rejects towards me." And the fact that the man so easily changed his mind
about which woman to pursue in his quest for marriage tells me that he is more 
interested in having a wife than he is in the actual woman. Basically, he likes the 
idea of marriage more than he likes the woman he is asking to marry him. 

I've been the "Lizzie" in this situation a few times. Either a friend didn't like the guy 
she went on a date with and tried to set me up with him instead, or family members
 find out that a man is interested in my sister, but since she is taken, they try to redirect
him towards me.  I feel obligated to be nice and at least attempt to go on the date, but I
always feel awkward while on the date, and then I just get frustrated with whoever set up
the date in the first place. My way of thinking is that if he doesn't really want to
 take me out in the first place, then what is the point of going? He won't be
 happy, I won't be happy. Why push it? 

This sense of "not pushing it" also applies to dating in general, not simply the dates that 
other people coerce us to go on.  Anecdotal example: I went on a few dates with a guy
 named Anthony. We had fun, laughed a lot together, enjoyed good conversation, we had
met each others' parents. Things seemed to be going pretty well. We both got busy with 
work and school, and life in general, but still had plans to go out soon. A few days before 
we were supposed to go out, I still hadn't heard from Anthony, so I send him a message 
saying that I'm excited to see him again. No response. No response for days. Now it's the 
day Anthony and I were supposed to go out, but I still don't hear from him. Instead of 
getting all dolled-up and waiting around for him, and then being disappointed when he 
didn't show up, I made my own plans and had fun. Yes, it hurt that he blew me off without
 even a lame excuse, but I was not about to let it ruin my night or my life. Moral of the Story 
here is that is he isn't going to put in the effort to try to keep you, don't put in the effort to try 
to make him. If he doesn't want to be with you, then he is the one with the problem, not you. 
To me, if you gave it a solid shot but things didn't work like you'd thought, No Harm,
 No Foul, No More Dates. Don't misunderstand, I'm willing to put in the
time and effort that maintaining a relationship requires; however, I will not be the only 
one putting in that effort. As long as we are both interesting in keeping the relationship
going, then I will be more than happy to do my part. But if you can't be bothered with it,
then I am not going to waste my time trying to make things work for you. 

I'm a grown woman. I am not going to chase after you. I will not pine when you move on 
without even the courtesy of telling me. I will not beg you to stay with me, or to give me 
one more chance. At this point, I assume that anyone I go on a date with is capable of
 adult-thinking and knows that their actions have consequences. If you don't want to
 keep seeing me, be a man and tell me. I will think better of you if you tell me upfront
 rather than if you just leave me hanging. 

"If he isn't calling you, it's because you aren't on his mind. "Busy" in another word for Jerk." 
I don't know who is quoted as saying this, but they have a point. And I don't have time for 
jerks in my life.