I've had a lot of time to think recently, not about anything in particular, but about all things. One recurring thought is based on the actions of other people and their motivations behind those actions. I've noticed that a lot of people seem to be "looking out for number one" so to speak, and only doing what benefits them, no matter what the outcome is for anyone else. There are those who perform good actions, but only when they believe that they will have something good happen to them in return. While I understand the notion of Quid Pro Quo, I'm not sure that I agree with it completely. Personally, I think that people should be good because it is the right thing to do. We should be good for the sake of being good.
Now, I don't want to start off on the wrong foot; this is not an angry post, and this is not me telling you that you are a terrible person for acting a certain way. That isn't the case at all. I'm just writing down a few things that I have noticed while people watching. While writing this, I am actually laying upside down in comfy pants (thanks to Mark) with the fan on and listening to my Happy Music playlist. There is no way that I could be angry when writing this post. Honest.
Let's start with an anecdotal background, shall we...
Yesterday I had my hair cut and was able to donate 10 inches of hair to Locks of Love. For those of you who don't know, Locks of Love is a non-profit organization that donates hair pieces to children suffering from medical issues (http://www.locksoflove.org/). I was able to have my hair cut and feel pretty, as well as donate my hair to a child in need to help him/her feel pretty. I could have just let the hairdresser cut my hair and let it all fall to the floor, but since I was eligible to donate my hair to such a wonderful cause, I knew that I should do the right thing and help someone else out. I didn't think twice about it.
Later that evening, when I was telling a friend what I had done, she asked me a question that was completely unexpected: "Since you donated your hair, did you still have to pay for your haircut? I think that since you gave your hair to a little kid that you shouldn't have to pay for it..."
Like I said, that was completely unexpected. It had never occurred to me to ask for a free haircut because I was being nice and donating the hair being cut. I don't have that mindset of "I'll do something for you if you do something for me."I wasn't sure how to answer her question at first, but after a moment of giving her the nose-crinkled, squinty-eyed "Are you stupid...?" look, I calmly answered that, no, I hadn't asked about any discounts for donations. I paid for my haircut as I normally would have, and went on with the rest of my day.
Surely I cannot be the only person who would have acted this way. I am realistic and know that there are those who would have only given their hair to charity if they had received the free haircut, but I can't possibly be the only person to give such a donation without the pretense of getting something in return.
Let's expand the scenario. Giving old clothes to The Goodwill. Handing out spare change to collectors at stoplights. Donating canned goods to the Boy Scout Troop collecting for a homeless shelter downtown. Do other people just shrug them off because those organizations are not able to benefit the first person? I know that we live in a "Dog Eat Dog" world, but can't we just let the other dog cross the road without attacking him? Can't we let him go on about his life without taking all of his belongings for our own because they would improve our circumstances? Would it even be possible for us to help the other dog back to his house, even if he could not help us? (Now, I realize that I'm using a lot of play-on words here, but the point is still the same.)
I am not saying that I'm perfect and adhere to this thought at all times. I have my moments where I don't feel like taking care of myself, let alone helping everyone else out. But I do my best to help anyone that I can. I can't stand the thought that I was capable of helping a person better their life in some way, and I didn't do it because they couldn't give me anything in return.
Am I being too naive to think that people should want to help each other for absolutely no reason? Am I being a simpleton because I think that people should act out of goodness instead of what they could get in return? Am I being unrealistic in expecting people to go out of their way to help another person? I know that helping other people takes time, money, energy and other resources away from the person doing the helping, but does this mean that people should take care of themselves an no one else? Let me know what you think. I'm seriously interesting in finding out what other people do, how they act, and if I'm the only person who believes this way.
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